The Trip...
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THE BEGINNING
***640 miles***
Mapbook-check, sunblock-check, extra clothes-check, eyedrops, toolkit, flashlight, day lenses, night lenses-check, check, check. After months of planning we are finally ready to head out to Boynton Beach, Florida to see Wifey’s mom. We loaded up the bike with everything thing we thought we might need to make the trip and sent everything else via UPS. We could barely sleep because we were so excited. Wifey hadn't seen her mom in almost 14 years and I had never been to a beach or seen an ocean. Its about 10:00p.m. Saturday night, the bike is warming up and I am making one last check to make sure the packs are secure and wifey is making sure we didn't forget anything. ENOUGH ALREADY.... time to go! Our original route had us motoring I-70 all the way to St. Louis and then making a diagonal run down I-24 and I-75 to Florida. That went right out the window due to Midwest flooding. So now our plan is to run thru Kansas, Oklahoma, Arkansas, Tennessee, Mississippi, Alabama and on into the Sunshine state.
My boys over at Tri City Cycle re-jetted the carb and did a tune-up for me while they slapped some new tires on. My only concern was that the bike might run like doo-doo with the re-jet and might need an "on the fly" adjustment as we changed altitude. That proved to be an unwarranted concern. The bike was running strong and ran like the Warhorse that she is all the way there. Those guys really did a great job.
So we slap on our skidlids, say our good-byes and away we go. "Ready?" I ask, "Ready!" she replies. Off into the darkness to begin our great journey. We decided to run mostly at night to try to hide from the heat and hopefully deal with less traffic. Our only worry is that we might encounter deer at high speed but we hoped to fall in behind one of the big rigs that were sure to be along our path and that they would spook off any critters that may have wandered a bit too close to the road. My other concern was wifey. Only 3 days before she had to have a stent put in her kidney. She insisted she was fine but I still worried. There was no way she was going to miss out on a chance to see her mom. This trip would re-enforce her status as a true road warrior and an all around bad mo-fo. Enough babbling....we gotta get moving!
We make a quick pitstop at 7-11 for some fuel and hit Hwy 287. Goodbye Ft. Collins. We motor on down thru Loveland, Longmont, Broomfield and pull into a gas station in Arvada for one last check of the packs and to top off the fuel. Next stop, Limon. We jump on I-70 east and make our way thru the surprisingly heavy traffic but the road opens up just past the E-470 exit. I lean back and tell wifey, "Here we go." She gives me a quick hug as I roll on the throttle. We make our way east thru the moonlight. The air is getting colder. My face is cold and my legs are cold, even thru my chaps. We pull into Limon and whip out the facemasks and top off the tank. I'm still cold but we need to get going. Buy the time we hit Burlington I am shivering. WTF?!? I ride in 10-degree weather in January and don't get cold like this! This is not how I pictured it. We killed some time hanging out at a truckstop trying to warm me up. I put on all the clothes I had brought, threw my leathers back on, strapped on my facemask and we pointed ourselves towards Goodland, Kansas. In Goodland we make a quick pitstop and jump back on the highway. I start pushing the bike a bit harder to try to make up for the time we lost due to my "sissification" and shivering in Burlington. We are a few hours behind where I wanted to be. We stomp down I-70, the 102 cubic inch motor humming away effortlessly. The sun is starting to come up as we are sneaking up on Hays, Kansas. The sunrise is amazing as it silhouettes the farmhouses and windmills. A truly awesome sight. It takes my mind off the chill that I still have. We pull off for gas and coffee. I'm shivering so badly I can't get into my wallet. Wifey teases my about it and just as I am about to growl back at her I remember her kidney. Guess she’s got a point. So we hit the road and head to Salina, KS where we make a quick right and started heading south on I-135 towards Wichita and Oklahoma. The suns up and it feels good. We cruise into Blackwell, OK and decide to get some rest and start out again after dark. DAMN it got hot fast in Oklahoma! We find a little out of the way motel, check in, unpack the scoot, grab some grub and crash out. So day one of our adventure comes to an end 640 miles from home.
DAY 2
***766 miles***
Midnight, the alarm goes off. WTF? I don't even remember going to bed! We roll out of the sack and start preparing for the day ahead. As we get dressed, I'm throwing on 3 shirts. No way am I repeating yesterday's fiasco. Again with the teasing from wifey. HAHAHA very funny. I drop the key off at the office and push the bike away from the motel so as not to wake everyone up when those straight pipes roar to life (I'm such a nice guy). Its friggin hot out. 12:34 A.M. and I'm sweating in my boots. While I am gassing up the bike and fighting off all the bugs flying around wifey is inside mackin' on the cute girl working. I kinda laugh to myself as she comes out and hands me a soda for the road. Its O-Dark-Thirty.....Time to roll. She hops onto the bike and settles into place. "Ready?" I ask. "Ready." she replies. We point the Warhorse towards Oklahoma City and let 'er fly. We bounce our way thru some road construction, which didn't make wifey happy at all. I try to avoid the bumps when I can, knowing that every bump will jab that stent into her left kidney. The cities we passed thru were all lit up like Christmas. Other than the occasional semi, we were the only things on the road. Solitude at 70 mph. Now with all the lights of Oklahoma City I'm not entirely sure when the brights on the bike burned out. It did seem a bit dark when we pulled into a gas station to top off before heading out to the middle of nowhere. When I fired the bike back up I noticed that we had no headlight. I flicked the switch down to the dims and the light came back on. I kicked on the brights and it went dark again. Back and forth, back and forth. Hoping the brights would magically come back. No such luck. Better than nothing I guess. We did a quick map check and rolled out and onto I-40 east. Wifey was the first to say it. How clean the air was as we made our way thru eastern Oklahoma. An hour or so down the road and we ran into some pretty thick fog. We cautiously made our way thru that for almost 100 miles. No joke, 100 miles of fog. And more rough roads. Everytime we hit those hard bumps I could feel her grab me tighter. The roads thru eastern Oklahoma pretty much sucked. By the time we got to Ft. Smith on the Arkansas border she was in serious pain. I felt bad because the only thing I could offer her for comfort were words. We pulled into a truckstop/convenience store/Wendy's for some coffee and a bit of a reprieve for her. While we where hanging out there we ran into a fellow rider from Trinidad, Colorado who was on his way to see his sister in North Carolina. We swapped a few stories and then parted ways. Wifey said she was good to go but I could see it in her eyes that she wasn't. We stripped off some of the extra layers we were wearing and she hopped back onto her throne. "Ready?" I asked, "Ready" she said. We marched out onto I-40 and headed to Little Rock. Now talk about a pretty ride! The piece of road from Ft. Smith to Little Rock was another awesome ride. It reminded me of riding in the mountains back home in Colorado. Beautiful. We enjoyed the scenery all the way to Little Rock. We pulled over for gas and a drink and I whipped out my trusty bankcard. DECLINED?!? WTF? Seems as though my bank decided to hold a tax check that I deposited before I left for "7 business days". SON OF A---- ..whatever. I then pulled out my trusty cash! Time to boogie to Memphis. Wifey is on the back, texting away to the kids and her mom letting them know where we were and that we were alright. The ride to and thru Memphis was pretty uneventful except for the sweltering heat. We pulled into a convenience store just south of Memphis as we got on I-55 in Mississippi. Little gas for the bike, some energy drinks for me and some cranberry juice and aspirin for wifey. While she is making a few phone calls I start doing some math. Not bad, I say. Riding 2 up, fully loaded saddlebags and tour pack and 75 -80 mph and we are averaging 43-46 mpg pushing a 102 inch motor. That made me smile because I had planned for worse mileage and more expensive fuel. That means I got extra money! Gotta like that. A sharp poke in the ribs gets my attention....""Ready?" she asks...."Ready" I say. We climb back on the Warhorse and point her south on I-55. Mississippi was an incredible place to ride. I absolutely loved it. Big trees lined both sides of the interstate, a 50 yard wide grass median separated the northbound and southbound lanes, swamps and all kinds of neat things. By the time we were approching Jackson, MS we were beat and wifey was hurting. So far though, no case of monkeybutt. The back is a little stiff but riding with apehangers will do that from time to time. We pull into a motel in Jackson, unload the bike, order up some pizza and crash out. Another early start tomorrow. The end of day 2 finds us 766 miles closer to Boynton Beach, Florida and 1400 miles from home.
DAY 3
***921 miles***
So the beginning of day 3. Not much sleep due to the noisy roofing crew that had booked a ton of rooms at the same motel. 3 a.m. and we are ready to load up and roll out for another day on the road. Revenge is sweet I think to myself as I fire up the bike and let the pipes roar off the building. Wifey and I laugh as we watch all the lights in the motel come on and people poking their heads out the door to see what all the commotion is about. "Take that!" I shout as I push the rpms up even more. I can actually feel the reverberations coming back off the motel at me. I let 'er rip as I leave the parking lot, pipes ablazing. We tool around looking for a place so get some fuel for the bike and some fuel for us. I slam an energy drink or two as wifey drinks her coffee and loads up on some of her prescription goodies for her kidney. Away we go, down I-55, headed to Hattiesburg, MS. We fall in behind a line of semis and follow Hwy 49 thru the countryside. I am amazed at all the awesome country I have seen so far in Mississippi. As we approach the southern border the state I can start to smell the ocean and the humidity goes way up. Everything feels sticky. As the sun wakes up and comes out to play we blow by our little convoy of freight haulers and wave a friendly goodbye to them. As they flash their lights at us signaling their goodbye to us I smile because I can just tell this is going to be a good day. We roll on down Hwy 49 until we reach I-10. We stop to top off the tank and strip off some layers. Its getting hot fast. No time to waste, jump back onto I-10 east and throttle it up. We fly along until we reach this area called "Old Spanish Fort". We cross the bridge and to our right is a huge expanse of water. Not the ocean but an enormous bay that seems to go forever. Pretty cool stuff. We bail on until we hit Mobile, AL. Traffic slows me down to an impatient crawl. After seeing that bay I am dying to get to the ocean. We clear Mobile and the road opens up again. I smile and get a little throttle happy. We are buzzing along at 85mph, next thing I know I see cars coming up in my mirror. They must have been doing 110mph. They all blew by me like I was eating lunch. Holy Smoke! Time to really be on alert. I also found that there is something about the air here that seems to render turn signals inoperable. Nobody and I mean NOBODY is using them. The ride along I-10 seemed to go on and on and on and on. Now the monkeybutt starts setting in. My tailbone is starting to burn. Wifey is bouncing around like Sid the Sloth. Gotta love monkeybutt. NOT! Its not long before we are shortening up our runs between fuel stops just to get off the bike for a bit. After what seemed like an eternity, we approached Tallahassee....and more road construction. Uneven lanes, sore tailbone, bumpy roads, blazing heat, traffic and a bad kidney make for a miserable combination. We fought our way thru that little amusement ride and pulled over for gas and a rest in Lake City, Florida, just as we turned onto I-75 south. So we gas up and call Wifey’s mom while we rehydrate ourselves. I was ready to call it a day after hearing we were still at least 4-5 hours away. I pointed to a motel directly across from the gas station. We discussed it and I lost. Off we go down I-75 toward the Florida Turnpike .We make the on ramp and follow the signs and carefully obey the 65 mph speed limit signs. I guess we were the only ones who could read. No Lie...if you do less that 80mph on this tollroad you are roadkill. Fine by me. I got a sore butt, a sore back and its getting dark. The cool thing about the tollroad is that every 45 miles or so they have food, coffee, bathrooms and all kindsa little shops. Which is good because we got 218 miles to go on the tollroad. We get about 100 miles or so and it starts to rain. GREAT! Just what I need. I'm gonna invent wipers for motorcycle windshields. Now we are flying at 75+ in the dark with crazies all around us, on wet roads and with a wet windshield. I try to fall in behind a set of taillights so I got something to follow on this unfamiliar road but the splashback sucks, almost as bad as when the bigrigs pass us. As fast as it started it stopped. I learned in Florida that it can start raining like crazy with no warning what so ever. BAM! yer soaked. Then just as fast it will stop, but yer still soaked and still dealing with splashback. We finally reach the end of the tollroad, when we pulled up to the tool booth I about dropped the bike due to all the oil and antifreeze that cars had leaked. That was fun. So we paid our 3 million dollar toll and started looking for exit 86..in the dark. We roll onto the off ramp and follow the signs to Boynton Beach. We finally make it to town and call Wifey’s mom, at 10:30 P.M. As fate would have it we were only about 5 minutes away from her house. We made our way thru town and spotted them out on the street waiting for us. It was so nice to see a friendly face and know we had made our destination safely. We cruise up the driveway and shut' er down breathing a huge sigh of relief. Seeing wifey reunited with her mom after all these years was worth the grueling day we put in. The steak dinner they had waiting for us was cool too. We started the day at 3am on the very northern end of Jackson, Mississippi and made it to "ma's" house in Boynton Beach, FL about 18 hours and close to 1000 miles later. So the first 3 days of our journey had been quite the little escapade. The ticker has 2358 new miles on it and we had seen Kansas, Oklahoma, Arkansas, Tennessee, Mississippi, Alabama and Florida. I hear the ocean calling my name, but first I gotta get me some sleep.
FLORIDA
As I open my eyes and try to focus, I take a deep breath and notice how much thicker the air seems here in Florida. I also notice that I am the only one in bed. So I flip myself to the edge of the bed on glance at the clock. 4:35! I get dressed and head out to the living room. I’m diggin’ the air conditioning after spending the past few days in the sun. Speaking of sun, I finally found a sunblock that kept me from getting roasted in the sun like a Thanksgiving turkey. Us fair skinned folks of Norse and Scottish descent don’t do so well in prolonged sunlight! I have actually been hospitalized because of sunburns and have burnt some of the color right out of my nose. I used the spray on Tropicana 70 SPF. I am impressed. Anyway, I start looking around the house for any signs of life. I finally find everyone out on the covered porch on the shady side of the house. I look right at wifey and say " My first day in Florida and you let me sleep it away?" She looked at me like a child that had just been scolded. "Uh Oh" I think to myself, I know that look "I’m in trouble." So she very calmly looks up and replies, "You were in Florida all day yesterday, pinhead. There is soda in the fridge." We have been married 14 years, I know when to shut up. " OK, I’ll grab the rest of the stuff out of the bike." I grab me a Coke and pop it open as I head for the door. As I grab the doorknob I notice that it’s a tad on the warm side. I swing the door open and BOOM, instant blast furnace! Holy God is it hot. Even under the carport in the shade the pavement is hot. Guess I know why they are on the other side of the house. I start grabbing stuff out of the bike as fast as I can and unstrap the tour pack. 5 minutes outside and my clothes are stuck to me and sweat is pouring down my face. I drag everything inside and literally need to go towel off and change my shirt. WOW! That’s a whole different kinda hot. We just sat around that house for the rest of the day, wifey and her mom babbling on for endless hours about everything that had been going on in their lives and washing our road clothes. I relegated to playing with the dog and just letting them be. After all, it had been well over a decade since they had seen each other. So I’m laying on the floor with my new four legged buddy, Fritz, I notice that wifey’s feet are swollen up. I ask her about it and she says that she started swelling up a day or so after she had her kidney worked on back in Colorado. Her knees are swollen and her midsection was starting to swell too. Typical wifey, insisting she is fine. She doesn’t lie so well. There is more to the story but she hasn’t told her mom. The kidney problem is a result of all the meds the doctors put her on over the years because of another issue. Severe narrowing and major bone spurs in her left hip. The orthopedic surgeon said he was amazed she could even walk. She is having a complete hip replacement when we get back to Colorado. The swelling is due to the combination of meds, poor kidney function because of the meds and pinched nerves and vessels because of the hip problem. By the time you read this, her hip replacement will have been done. So tell me the woman is not a true road warrior! A grade A, genuine, bad to the bone road warrior.
We decide to head to a local auto parts store to pick up a replacement bulb for the brights we burned out in OKC. We do our business there and head back to the car. Wifey and her mom are sitting up front gabbing away as usual when I ask wifey if she brought the camera. No such luck. She inquires as to why I wanted it. I point out the back window. There we see this 6ft beach bunny stripping down and changing into her bikini right in the middle of the parking lot like she was at home in the privacy her own room! The amazing part is that nobody seemed to really notice. I sure as hell did! Right about now I’m thinking I kinda like Florida. So we head back to the house and I proceed to install the new bulb. We get cleaned up and boogie over to Red Lobster for some fresh seafood unlike the "fresh" seafood we get in the mountains! We decide to just relax for the rest of the day and tomorrow is the day I have been waiting for. We are going to the beach! I finally get to see the ocean for the first time.
8:00 A.M. and I’m like a kid at Christmas. We make our way thru town and right before we get to the ocean we stop. WTF? Wifey’s mom points to the enormously huge building. I mean absolutely huge. She asks if we know what that is. Hotel? Airport? Hospital? Nope. Its Oprah’s house. A disgustingly monstrous display of wealth. You could have 5 families living there and they would never see each other. I’m guessing 50,000 sq.ft. Why would you need a house that big? Disgusting. Must be nice. So we drive around this house that is blocking the path to the beach. We pull into the parking lot and I run out to look over the railing. There it is! 50 yards away is the Atlantic Ocean. There was almost nobody on the beach and the water was so calm it looked like blue ice. We made our way to a spot on the beach and set up camp. Wifey was so excited. She grew up near the ocean but had been to one in forever. We raced to the water and splashed our way thru the surf. AWESOME. The water was warm, the sky was blue and the sun was out. We played in the water forever. I didn’t wanna leave but the intense lightning of the approaching storm changed my mind. We went to the beach a time or two again and got the grand tour of southern Florida. Including the signs on the side of the roads warning you not to feed the alligators! DUH! We visited with wifey’s family that live there and did a few family get togethers. Our week in Florida came to an end all too soon. We almost didn’t come back. If it wasn’t for the upcoming surgery we might not have. That night we packed up the bike and got it all ready for the next days journey. We were on our way north to Kentucky to see wifey’s father for a few days. This should be interesting because I don’t think he ever liked me. So Monday morning arrives and we say our good-byes to everyone and make our way back to the tollroad that leads out of town. Wifey is visibly sad. I don’t wanna go either. We stop at a gas station to fill up on fuel and with one last look we say goodbye to Boynton Beach.
FLORIDA TO KENTUCKY
***1019 miles***
Again we find ourselves flying down the Florida Turnpike at breakneck speed. This time we are headed north. Traffic isn’t all that bad and the sky is looking clear. We are enjoying the cool morning air knowing full well that it won’t last long. We motor along for about an hour or so when we decide to make a quick pitstop at one of the service plazas on the pike. We pull in right next to an older looking Goldwing, with a Michigan plate that’s loaded down about as much as we are. While we are in the plaza getting a quick beverage, I was looking around for someone who looked like they would be the owner of the Wing. As we exit the plaza and head for the scoot, I see the Wing pulling out onto the turnpike. He must have seen us in his mirror because he waved back at us as he left. We climbed back onto the Warhorse and pointed her toward the road and off we went. Everything around us was so green. I didn’t get a chance to notice this on our way in because of the darkness and the rain. We motored along, enjoying the ride and before we knew it another few hours had passed by. Time to stop at the next plaza and gas up. When low and behold, guess who we see at the plaza? Our rider on the Wing. He was just sitting under a tree enjoying a cup of coffee and taking a break. As we pull in he waved again. We gassed up and grabbed some juice and decided to go introduce ourselves. He was an older guy just our riding with "nowhere" as his destination. He said, eventually he will make his way back to Michigan. We talked bikes and routes for a few, then bid each other farewell and safe journey and made our way back to the turnpike. We leapfrogged each other for the next 100 miles or so until we got to I-10 where he headed west and we kept going north on I-75 into Georgia. Wifey was busy texting her mom back in Boynton Beach keeping her updated where we were. Her mom kept asking us if we were sure we wanted to keep going and kept telling us that the door would be unlocked if we decided to turn around and come back. As we crossed the line into the great state of Georgia the sun was getting angry and showed us this by hammering us with unrelenting heat. My backside was starting to ache and wifey was starting to fidget. We pulled off in Adel, Georgia for a prolonged gas and rest stop. The heat was getting bad, which made the sore backsides seem even worse and we discussed the timing of going thru Atlanta. Everyone I had talked to over the course of the past few months had filled me full of horror stories about the traffic in Atlanta and the homicidal tendencies of the drivers. We were both very eager NOT to experience this. We decided to cruise for a bit longer and pull off for the night just short of Atlanta. We work up the gumption to sit back on the bike and hop back onto I-75. No sooner do we hit a good highway speed when we run into more road construction. I absolutely hate road construction. Back in 1994 I went down hard in road construction. I ended up with a broken cheekbone, 4 skull fractures, 2 brain injuries and various other busted and cracked bones to go along with a busted bike and a few hundred miles of road rash. So needless to say, road construction is not my favorite thing I the world. Georgia seemed to be nothing but construction zones. So we white knuckled our way north for another 100 miles or so when we saw a string of motels and restaurants in Perry. Good enough. We coasted off the highway and looked for a suitable place to spend the night. I guess I didn’t realize how hot It had become until I walked into the lobby to check in. The cold air from the air conditioner almost brought me to my knees. I could actually feel the cold air fill my lungs in sharp contrast to the sun baked heat of the rest of my body. "Long ride?’ the dude behind the counter asked me. "Not really’ I replied, "only about 500 miles, but its roasting out." The dude looked shocked "Only 500?" he said almost unbelieving. He hooked us up with a room at a pretty good price. We rolled over to the room and unpacked the bike and kicked on the air conditioner. Wifey started laughing at me. "What?" I said. "Go look in the mirror. Your beard and chest are all black from the road." So I kicked off my boots and walked over to the mirror. Yup Yup she was right. I was covered in tar residue. That’s just dandy. The room got nice and cool quickly and I was just getting comfy when she decided we were hungry and needed a pizza or 2 and some sodas. So we called up a pizza joint and ordered up one of the specials they had. I wasn’t thinking clearly at the time or I would have realized that there was no way the two of us were gonna mow down two pizzas, bread sticks and two 2 liters of soda. But hey, sounded like a deal to me. We get all cleaned up and the grub shows up at the door. We stuff ourselves and hit the sack. We are going to start out early so we will miss morning traffic in Atlanta. I was so tired I didn’t even really remember going to bed. I just know the alarm was going off at 1:30 in the morning. We drag ourselves out of bed and loaded up the bike. We are getting good at this load, unload thing. As I am out strapping the top roll onto the tour pack, 2 guys pull up in a moving truck and head for a room. They look beat. I walk over to them and tell them, "This is gonna sound weird coming from a guy you don’t know in the middle of a parking lot, BUT, I’m getting ready to hit the road and I have a whole pizza that we didn’t eat. I hate to see food go to waste. You guys want it?" Talk about a couple of happy campers! They thanked me a hundred times for the food and scampered off to their room. A few minutes later as I am checking the tire pressure and doing a quick walk around the bike a Perry police officer pulls up in his cruiser and asks me in a very thick southern accent "Is that y’alls bike?" I saunter over to his car, fully expecting him to ask me to not do so, but he didn’t. I informed him that I was on a roadtrip and I was getting ready to head out to miss traffic. He look relieved and said "Oh, ok. I was just checking. Someone in the motel called us and was concerned about you being around the bike." That’s kinda cool, I thought to myself. I offered to prove to him that I did indeed own the bike. The strange part is he said that "isn’t necessary." I must have still had that puzzled look on my face when I went back into the room. Wifey asked me what was up and I in turn relay the story to her. She couldn’t believe that he came all the way out to the motel on a suspicious person call and didn’t ask for I.D. or want proof of ownership. I’m just glad it didn’t turn into a hassle. Enough of that, time to get going. As we sneak up on Macon, Georgia we run into even more construction. We navigate our way thru that and jump on the I-475 bypass and head toward Atlanta. Its about 3:00 a.m. or so when we roll into town. We position ourselves in the center lane and let ‘er fly. Atlanta is scenic even at that time of day. Towering buildings lit up like Christmas trees. Just as I was starting to enjoy what sites I could see, while navigating the roads and dodging traffic I had hoped would not be there, its started drizzling. We stopped in Marietta to clean the windshield and top off the tank. Then back out onto I-75 where it proceeded to mist and rain on us all the way into Chattanooga, TN. We then changed to I-24 and started off into Tennessee. Even in the soggy, foggy weather that southern part of the state was killer. The highway twisted around lakes, rivers and mountains. It was absolutely stunning. I could easily see myself living there. One thing is for sure, folks in Tennessee sure like the fireworks. There were giant firework stores all along the interstate. We made our way into Kentucky and twisted around on the backroads until we finally got to her father’s house in Morganfield. The time had come as we rolled into the driveway. I still had the feeling that he wasn’t really fond of me. Not that it really mattered to me but I just didn’t want that to taint wifey’s visit. He and his wife came out to greet us and had genuine smiles on their faces. I guess the years had changes his and my outlook. After all I had been "taking care of his little girl" for almost 15 years. We got cleaned up and just relaxed around the house until dinner then it was off to bed. The heat had just drained us both. The next day they wanted to show us around the area. I was surprised by what I saw. There was a very heavy biker population. Bikes everywhere. Then he said he HAD to take us to Sturgis. Now I’m puzzled. Sturgis? South Dakota? Nope, Sturgis, Kentucky. What a cool place! Just a small little town in the sticks. What I didn’t know is that they hold a "Little Sturgis" rally, complete with concerts, vendors and all sorts of stuff. They were just setting up for it as we passed thru. He took us to a bike shop, which I thought was completely out of character for him since the last time we spoke he expressed his opinion that he didn’t like the idea that I was a biker. Too bad for him. Anyway, he took us to this placed called Custom Biker Wear. What a cool place! You name it, they got it. Vests, jackets, shirts, chaps, parts, trinkets, glasses, saddlebags, tour packs and all kindsa stuff. And the prices are awesome. It’s a good thing I only took a little money with me when we went out or I could have spent a whole lot! I will go back there soon…with a pocket full of cash. We finally went back to the house and wifey’s dad and his wife had a prior commitment for that afternoon and evening so when they left we decide to go cruise the Kentucky countryside and check it out. Another awesome ride. Tall cornfields, forests, big lakes, the whole shootin’ match. I really was diggin’ it. The sun was starting to set and I was in an unfamiliar area and had already seen a few deer so it was time to get home. Besides we only has a few hours to get some sleep before we had to leave. 2:00 a.m. rolled around and we were once again loading up the bike. We hung out for a bit just talking to her dad and watching the fireflies. The time came where we had to roll. We did a quick map check to find the best way to get to I-64, said our good-byes. That was the first time he ever shook my hand. We had a good time in Kentucky but we had to go. "Ready?" I asked, "Ready!" she replied. Off into the blackness for the next leg of our journey.
KENTUCKY TO COLORADO
***1140 MILES***
So away we go, in the moonlight of the Kentucky countryside, on our way back to Ft. Collins, Colo. We slowly move thru the rolling hills and cornfields, decelerating often to create the distinctive roar from the straight pipes to ward off any unsuspecting critters that might be lurking nearby. In the darkness, Kentucky was peaceful and scenic but my mind was fixated on the weather reports I had been watching earlier in the day. They were calling for thunderstorms, some of them severe, all throughout the Midwest. Some of them right in our path. I asked the motorcycle gods to grant us a safe days journey. We made our way thru some small towns and crossed the Ohio river via the Twin Bridges and rolled into Evansville, Indiana. We pulled up at a stoplight near the middle of town and waited for the light to turn green. We waited and waited and waited some more. Finally a rock and roll hillbilly pulls up next to us. Very cool, I think to myself, the truck should trip the light. So we waited and waited and yes waited some more. Hillbilly turns down his music and shouts over the thumping of the bike " Nice bike ya got there." To which I reply with a thank you. Both of us are now looking around. Checking our mirrors and looking thru the parking lots and sidestreets. I can tell we are both thinking the same thing. "I think there is something wrong with the light." he hollers. I nod in agreement. Wifey says the coast is clear, shes no dummy, shes hip to whats going on. We both nod to each other and kick our vehicles into gear. With one last look around we move on thru the intersection. I keep checking my mirrors for Johnny Law for the next few blocks but fortunately they must have had more important business somewhere else. Chalk one up for the motorcycle gods. We make our way to I-64 and pull into a truckstop for some fuel and a drink. Three bikes pull in right behind us. We all gas up and do our thing. After returning to the bikes we started up a conversation. Turns out they we on their way back from Colorado. We chitchatted for a few and wifey reminded me that we needed to get going. We wished each other a safe trip and hopped back on the bike. "Ready?" I asked "Hell yes." She replied. That made me chuckle. As we cruised back onto I-64 east my mind kept playing back the weather reports. Heavy rain and possible tornadoes. We scooted along eastward until we got to Mount Vernon, Illinois. Time was really flying. We both thought we had gone thru some sort of wormhole because we both could swear we lost an hour somewhere. Wifey is limping a bit as we head into the gas station. She insisted she was ok but I could see in her eyes that she was hurting. We had logged thousands of miles in the past week or so and I could tell that bad hip and stent in her kidney were really bothering her. Add the fact that she had been sitting on the back of the bike for what seemed like forever at times and you got all the makings for a painful day. I gas up the Warhorse and wait for her to return. She is limping badly and informs me that he legs and feet are really swollen up bad. "Lets get you home." I say. She struggles to get on the bike. She leans forward and hugs me and says "Get me home." I power out of the station and back onto the highway. Now we are on a mission to get home. With my eyes on the sky we fly towards St. Louis. Thru the buildings you could see the Gateway Arch as we approached. Wifey whipped out the camera and starting taking pictures. We blew across the MLK Bridge onto I-70 and into Missouri. Saturday morning and the traffic was light. I was pushing just past the speed limit to try to make some time. I could feel wifey shifting around on the back. We clear St. Louis and the metro area and I get on the throttle. Blowing by cars like they were parked. In the distance I could see storm clouds. We pull off at Boonville to get some food. We are sitting in Wendy’s looking at the maps and a trucker sitting by us asked us where we were headed. We told him that we were on our way home to Colorado. He said that he had run into some bad weather coming from that direction as he was on his way to West Virginia and that we should be careful. We decide its time to see how far we can get before the weather starts pounding us. As we head to the bike another guy asks us if we were headed west. "Nasty weather out there, be careful." We hop back onto I-70 west and roll on the throttle. Not but a mile later we start getting wet. Then it opens up on us. We pull off at the next exit and into the Dogwood Truckstop. I park the bike in an out of the way place and we take cover from the rain under the awning for the gas pumps. That’s when it really started coming down. The guy inside the station kept looking out the window at us. I bet we looked pathetic. He poked his head out the door and told me to pull the bike under the awning. Totally cool! After I push the bike under the cover he tells us to come inside and dry off. He is a younger guy, maybe in his late 20’s. He got his music going and hes just singing away having a good time. We chatted for a bit and the rain started to let up. I bought wifey some scratch tickets to help kill the time and maybe take her mind of her pain for awhile. Some of his friends came rushing in and told him that they were going tornado chasing. I look out the door at the sky. Them clouds sure did look unfriendly. 100 yards away I could tell how wet the highway was by the sound of the truck tires splashing around. I look over and could see 15 ft. rooster tails coming from the back of the semis. I gazed at the sky, glaring thru the clouds to show my displeasure with the motorcycle gods. The rain broke and we gave many thanks to the guy for letting us hideout there. We stomped back out onto the highway and it started raining again. The wind was pushing the rain across the road at a 45-degree angle. I was miserable. Wifey was too. We pulled off at exit 74 when we saw a motel/truckstop/café. I finally decided to go ahead and get on of the overpriced rooms there and grab something to eat. So we order our overpriced, under portion meals that they wanted to charge us extra for because we wanted to take it back to our room and eat. Now I’m getting riled up. Bad attitudes, overpriced and small meals. I’m already wet and cold and angry that we only got 400 miles in today. We get to our room where the air conditioner/heater was about as unreliable as the cable TV. We scarfed down our food, which was mediocre at best, and try to get comfy. Wifey’s feet where so swollen that we could barely get her boots off. Her knees and legs were also in a swollen state. I laid her down and elevated her feet. She was talking to her mom back in Florida when out of nowhere her entire foot cramped up. Toes curled and pointed in all directions. I grabbed her foot and held her toes straight. She was in immense pain. After a few minutes the cramping stopped and I got her into a warm tub to relax her muscles. I was worried now. Her feet looked like they were full of Jell-O. She finally got relaxed and we hit the sack so we could start out early. We were gonna make it home tomorrow not matter what.
Another early morning. It’s a bit brisk outside due to the rain that came down all night long. We load up the bike and point it toward I-70. I jet down the onramp and fall in behind a semi that is blazing its way west. For a minute I thought my glasses were fogging up. I was partially right. The fog was getting thicker and thicker. I backed off the throttle a bit to create some room between us and the semi just incase something goofy happened. We jammed our way west and at times we slowed to a crawl because of visibility issues. We brawled with the fog all the way to thru Kansas City. Oh joy, we are now entering Kansas. Let the good time begin. ACK! The good thing about Kansas is that it’s a straight shot all the way thru. And if you were so inclined you just might be able to push that posted speed limit….just a tad. Now I am not admitting anything, but we were making some REALLY good time. The fog had cleared and the skies were blue. So as we slammed our way across Kansas, wifey started twisting and fidgeting signaling to me that she was starting to battle the pain again. We screamed our way across the plains and rolled into the Maple Hill truck stop for a prolonged rest stop. This stop ended up costing me some cash! Little did I know that this truckstop in the middle of nowhere had a gift shop. Wifey plus gift shop equals an empty wallet! It was almost miraculous how shopping nullified the pain she was in. Go figure. So after we dropped some of the excess cash we were carrying, we loaded up and boogied back down the highway. If you have ever been thru Kansas then you know the story. Part of the "beauty" of Kansas is that there is nothing there but windfarms and open fields. We kept talking back and forth to fight of the boredom. The sun was beating down on us as we might have accidentally eclipsed the legal speed limit. Everything was going well until the wind picked up near Colby, Kansas. Now I am leaning halfway off the left side of the bike just to keep us straight. We motor into Goodland for a pitstop. Holy cow the crosswinds were getting mean. I tried to find a shady spot to take our drink break. No shade to be found. The sun is hammering us as bad as the wind. Wifey can barely get off the bike. She fights her way down and plops down on the bench in front of the gas station. I go in and get her a Gatorade. She is almost in tears from the pain. She asks me how much longer we got to go. When I told her we were still about 250 miles out she looked like I had just crushed her world. But ever the badass she said, "Then lets saddle up and get going." What an animal. The winds were even worse now. The motorcycle gods were testing us. Testing our will to accomplish our goal. We refused to lose. The gods threw the winds at us as hard as they could. We were unfazed as I leaned harder on the bike. We found some relief in the form of sympathetic truck drivers who pulled up on our left to help block the wind. We stomped our way into Limon. Weary and windwhipped but determined. We took another prolonged break at a truckstop in Limon where people who had been driving near us said they couldn’t believe that we were out defying the wind. Now wifey is really hurting. I figured that since the wind is blowing hard from the south we would take Hwy 71 north out of Limon and into Brush and let the wind push us for awhile. Besides I like Hwy 71 and we could use Brush and Ft. Morgan to shield us from the wind if it was still ripping up that way. So wifey fights her way back up on the bike. "Ready, babydoll?" I ask. "Ready." She replies. So we backtrack thru Limon a bit and hop on Hwy 71 north. WOW I forgot what it was like to not have to fight to keep the bike upright. We must have been moving along at the same speed as the wind because the air seemed absolutely still. Like in a dream. No wind whipping across my ears. Complete silence except for the rumbling of the exhaust. Now effortlessly gliding at 80 mph we gallop our way into Brush and switch to Hwy 34. We blow thru Ft. Morgan and into Greeley. Wifey perks up a bit as we slip onto Hwy 85 and head towards Hwy 392 into Windsor. The 30 mph speed limit thru Windsor seemed ultra slow compared to the 80 mph we were used to running at. I had to keep myself in check not to get a speeding ticket going thru town. I was eager to get home as we turned off onto our street. We pulled into our driveway and our daughter came running up to help wifey off the bike. She was swollen and sore. She could barely move. I had a bad case of monkeybutt but felt out of place saying anything. Everything aside we had an awesome time. We had left Colorado, motored thru Kansas, Oklahoma, Arkansas, Tennessee, Mississippi, Alabama, Florida, Georgia, back thru Tennessee, Kentucky, Indiana, Illinois, Missouri, back again thru Kansas and home to Ft. Collins. We saw some really cool stuff, been to places we had never been, met some really awesome people, swam in the ocean and got to spend a lot of time together. It was completely incredible but there is just something about sleeping in your own bed. And wifey…she is doing good, shes a road warrior, what did you expect?
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